"A virtuous and worthy wife is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones." - Proverbs 12:4
I think many times, as wives, we do not really take the time to truly understand the role we play in the lives of our husbands. God did not put the man at the head because He thought less of the woman. He loves us the same. However, He needed to create an atmosphere of order in the home. So, He Chose the man to lead and the woman to submit and follow. However, with the role we have as wives, there is an incredible responsibility that in most cases is missed. It is often missed because as women we can not get past the word “submit,” and the annoyance that word brings!
Look at this Scripture though. Hmmm…We are a force in our husband’s life. Let me share the Scripture with you another way. A strong, able, and worthy woman is a crowning compass of joy to her husband, but she who makes him shamed, disappointed, and contradicts him is a rottenness to his bones.
WOW! We are a HUGE influence in our husband’s life. And, when we do not step into our roles as wives properly, we are a hindrance to our husbands. We are a bad influence. When we argue, fight, refuse to submit, boss, verbally bash privately or publicly, disrespect, and treat our husband in any way that is out of alignment with God’s Word, we are hurting them. We are ROTTING THEIR BONES!
Hey, I did not write the Word. God inspired men what to write. God made sure that we all know everything we need to live happy, peaceful, and joy-filled lives. His Word does not adapt itself with the times. His Word does not change to fit our needs or the culture. It just IS. We all have choices…we can obey and be blessed or we can disobey and bring ruin to ourselves and our husbands.
Ok so we can allow God to WORK in our husband’s life and heart. Help our husband BE what God created him to BE. Train our children to be God obeyers. Or we can ruin our husband and rotten his bones leading to divorce, hindering both ours and our husbands spiritual walk. It also trains our children to live selfish worldly lives.
To put it bluntly, we need to stop waiting for our husband’s to fulfill OUR needs and OBEY what God wants US to do as wives. NOT based on the performance of our husbands. We need to DO what God says to do BECAUSE God SAID it and HE knows best! When we let go of what we want and do what God wants, then and ONLY then will we truly have all that God wants us to have. Then and ONLY then will God actually have the room and ability to WORK in our husbands hearts and help our marriages. We cannot go on expecting God to change them and we are not even willing to do what God has said to do!
God, please forgive me for being a selfish wife. Please forgive me for unrealistic expectations, and expecting my husband to fulfill my needs. Help me to turn to You and allow You to be my source for everything. Please forgive me for being stubborn and expecting my husband to change before I will. Help me to love him. Help me to obey You and what You want regardless of my husband’s behavior. Help me to NOT be a rottenness to his bones. Help me to be a crowning joy to him that helps him to be all that You created him to be. Help me to love him unselfishly. Show me how I can honor, encourage, and delight my husband. Thank You for Your Word, Lord. Thank You for not changing with the times. Thank You for being the same yesterday, today, and forever. Help me to be consistent in all I do. Amen!
