Don't Rot The Man's Bones!

"A virtuous and worthy wife is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones." - Proverbs 12:4

I think many times, as wives, we do not really take the time to truly understand the role we play in the lives of our husbands. God did not put the man at the head because He thought less of the woman. He loves us the same. However, He needed to create an atmosphere of order in the home. So, He Chose the man to lead and the woman to submit and follow. However, with the role we have as wives, there is an incredible responsibility that in most cases is missed. It is often missed because as women we can not get past the word “submit,” and the annoyance that word brings!

Look at this Scripture though. Hmmm…We are a force in our husband’s life. Let me share the Scripture with you another way. A strong, able, and worthy woman is a crowning compass of joy to her husband, but she who makes him shamed, disappointed, and contradicts him is a rottenness to his bones.

WOW! We are a HUGE influence in our husband’s life. And, when we do not step into our roles as wives properly, we are a hindrance to our husbands. We are a bad influence. When we argue, fight, refuse to submit, boss, verbally bash privately or publicly, disrespect, and treat our husband in any way that is out of alignment with God’s Word, we are hurting them. We are ROTTING THEIR BONES!

Hey, I did not write the Word. God inspired men what to write. God made sure that we all know everything we need to live happy, peaceful, and joy-filled lives. His Word does not adapt itself with the times. His Word does not change to fit our needs or the culture. It just IS. We all have choices…we can obey and be blessed or we can disobey and bring ruin to ourselves and our husbands.

Ok so we can allow God to WORK in our husband’s life and heart. Help our husband BE what God created him to BE. Train our children to be God obeyers. Or we can ruin our husband and rotten his bones leading to divorce, hindering both ours and our husbands spiritual walk. It also trains our children to live selfish worldly lives.

To put it bluntly, we need to stop waiting for our husband’s to fulfill OUR needs and OBEY what God wants US to do as wives. NOT based on the performance of our husbands. We need to DO what God says to do BECAUSE God SAID it and HE knows best! When we let go of what we want and do what God wants, then and ONLY then will we truly have all that God wants us to have. Then and ONLY then will God actually have the room and ability to WORK in our husbands hearts and help our marriages. We cannot go on expecting God to change them and we are not even willing to do what God has said to do!

God, please forgive me for being a selfish wife. Please forgive me for unrealistic expectations, and expecting my husband to fulfill my needs. Help me to turn to You and allow You to be my source for everything. Please forgive me for being stubborn and expecting my husband to change before I will. Help me to love him. Help me to obey You and what You want regardless of my husband’s behavior. Help me to NOT be a rottenness to his bones. Help me to be a crowning joy to him that helps him to be all that You created him to be. Help me to love him unselfishly. Show me how I can honor, encourage, and delight my husband. Thank You for Your Word, Lord. Thank You for not changing with the times. Thank You for being the same yesterday, today, and forever. Help me to be consistent in all I do. Amen!

Speaking in Tongues

Growing up in the Church of Christ nothing was mentioned about God's gift of tongues. If it was it was for bible times and doesn't happen today. So when I met my husband, a hispanic pentecostal, I was a little taken back when I observed others speaking in tongues. For a long time I thought it was great that others experience it but still, deep down, thought it wasn't for me. After being in the pentecostal church for 7 years and married for 5, we had moved to Texas and completed membership with a non-demoniational church. They held a "Holy Spirit Encounter" for those who have not yet received the spirit with evidence of speaking in tongues. It was part of leadership and membership classes so we went. I guess I don't know what I was expecting but I am sure I wasn't expecting to leave there any different then I walked in. After listening to the Pastor holding the class tell stories for hours I finally made a comment to God..."If you want to give me this gift go ahead and hurry up so I can get out of here and go home!" Great attitude, right? Well what every it was something broke inside of me. The control left and by the end of the night I was speaking in tongues and I couldn't stop! Wailing and weeping...the language was powerful! I tried to stop but I couldn't. I tried to open my eyes or get off the floor...I had no control. Finally I was uttering "Thank You, Jesus!" over and over again. Finally something I understood! I don't know how I was effective without it before! I couldn't imagine not having it now.

This gift is available to any that will accept it. Loose control! Let HIM take over every part of your life...including your tongue!

REST? What's that?

"There just are not enough hours in the day!" "I have so much to get done but I don't have the time or the energy to do it!"

Ever caught yourself saying these things? I do, maybe too much. I'm always making excuses. I have four children now five years and under. They require a ton of my attention. My husband, the house, my ministry...There are just not enough hours in the day and even if there were I wouldn't have the energy to do it. Sometime I feel like I am just "going through the motions".

Females naturally function on "high speed" trying to juggle house, home, work, relationships. Us as Americans have also been taught this lifestyle of working around the clock. I know God did not intend for us as women, wives, and mothers to be so tired and worn out. I, for one, am too young to feel this way. Aren't I?

Yesterday, after a full day of breastfeedings, diaper changings, school work, breaking up fights, cleaning up messes, laundry, vacuuming, cooking, and shopping my husband arrived to take over and I headed to work. Yes at 6:30pm I started yet another "job". Sure the office lacked the screaming children and the responsibilities of a home but I was faced with a new set of responsibilities. Childcare schedules, printer malfunctions, computer issues, paperwork, and craft prep. Finally at 9:30pm I headed home giving up on the slow computer and faulty printer. Did I even get anything done?

I arrive home to my oldest two girls jumping around the living room at 10pm. My husband dozing off on the couch feeding the baby and a messy kitchen! So I put back on my mommy cap. Got the girls into bed and cleaned up the kitchen. Sat down to nurse the baby and flipped through the stations for a while. My body and brain were fried. Finally at 11:30pm my channel surfing lead me to a Joyce Meyer broadcast. Every time I watch her the Lord uses her to speak to me and last night was no different.

She was teaching on health and happiness. #1 Drink Water. Yuck! I am really bad at this...it has no taste. Ok, Lord, I will work on it. #2 Get enough sleep and rest. What's that? I guess she doesn't realize that I have four small children that need me around the clock and a husband that works hard and sleeps harder.

She spent the entire broadcast bringing home the point that we need to get rest to function. So I encourage you to join me as I strive to get rest. Not so much to take a nap but to sit still and know that He is God! I am asking God to bring resoration to my body and mind so that I can continue fulfilling the responsibilities that I have taken on as a women, wife, mother, and child of God!

Calling in Sick!

Have you ever wanted to just sit around all day sipping coffee, eating snacks and watching TV? Let the kids run wild, the laundry and dishes stack up, and throw the schedule out the window?

Yesterday was such a "rebellious" day for me. It was thunder storming all day here and dark and miserable. I took my time getting my shower. Let the kids sleep in and hang out in their pj's. Of course, I did change diapers and feed them breakfast. I had every intention of boycotting our daily schedule. The day started out slow but then something snapped around lunch time. I couldn't do it! The mess of toys all over the house was normal, yet it was really bothering me. Preparing lunch for my three hungry children became a huge task as I tried to maneuver around all the dirty dishes. My rebellious plan was thrown out the window and the daily schedule snook back into our lives.

Maybe that schedule isn't so bad after all? Not so sure I was happy during my brief moment of insanity. Sometimes it feels like that is all I do. Cook, clean, teach, discipline, etc. Should it be such a hassle?

God reminded me of the Proverbs 31 woman "She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day" proverbs 31:15 and "She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive." proverbs 31:27. So my prayer is that God gives me that desire each and every day. The desire to be productive and take care of my household. He will give me strength to start and the joy to continue!

Peace in my home?

We had a guest speaker at our MOPS meeting this morning. Her name is Amy and she is an annointed Mommy! I mean she has a "peaceful" home and is striving to share her tips with others. God really used her to speak to me personally...I know others were touched too. I really need to strive for peace in my home daily!

She shared with us 7 things that we can do to bring immediate peace in our home. It takes about an hour, while the kids nap or are watching a video.
1. Turn on some praise & worship music.
2. Bake something like cookies or brownies. Smells are great. Brewing coffee works for me...I love the smell, and the taste!
3. Take a basket and go throughout your main living areas and pick up "stuff" that doesn't belong there.
4. Vacuum the floor. A clear floor is great!
5. Pick up papers and put them in a basket or piles out of sight.
6. Get laundry out of sight. Don't have to put it away just put it in a basket and to the room it needs to be in.
7. Take your kids and sit down to relax and eat those yummy goodies you were baking! Enjoy the laughter!

Am I Heartless?

We received the news today that my great-aunt (finally) died on her 92nd birthday. I say "finally" because none of us ever thought she would live this long. She married only once years, and years ago but it didn't last long. She never had children. She lived a sad and lonely life. She was a smart lady that made a career at Kodak in Rochester, NY as a drafter? Come to think of it I don't even know what she did. The only thing I ever remember sharing in common with her was our love for architecture! She always struck me more "annoying" than "pleasurable" to be around. My grandmother, her sister and closest living relative, has cared for many things for her for years. She always seemed like she was a bother to my grandmother. My sister gave me the news of her passing via email today and for some weird reason...I have no response. I mean absolutely no emotion at all. I don't even feel bad for my grandmother. Is that bad? I don't think I am heartless but deep down maybe I think it is beneficial for my grandmother that she is gone. On the other hand I am not confident that she was a child of God. THAT is always heart renching no matter who it is.

Toy Organization

Ok so as a proud Mommy of 4 preschoolers we are obviously organizationally deprived. Our biggest issue right now is the crazy amount of TOYS that are scattered all over the house! After tripping over a pile of Barbie's this morning while carrying my 12 wk old...the revelation came to me that I had to do something about it. In between feedings and breaking up fights this morning I researched "organization tips" on the internet. The first step - weed out toys we don't use. Since I have 4 children ranging from 12 wks to 5 yrs we have toys for all ages. I went through all the toys this morning with my oldest and we filled up two plastic storage containers full of stuff to donate! Tons of toys, gone! Still looks like a toy store in here but it is a start. While we were sorting we tossed broken toys (surprisingly we had quite a few). Then I started looking for storage containers. Since we are on a tight budget right now .. the plan is to use what I have and then slowly purchase other storage containers. Great tip I found online was to use empty snack containers and mayo, peanut butter, and coffee jars. Plastic, of course, with lids. Plastic spray paint is great to cover up the ugly labels. So we are working on keeping dress up jewerly and Barbie shoes in containers and out of the reach of my 19 month old son who loves eating these things!

Organization Tips for Toys:
#1. No toy bins. Toy bins are for hiding toys, not for organizing. Toy chests are dumping places not places of honor for toys that you value.
#2. Everything has a place. As with all organizing, choose storage places that facilitate "use": a basket for books in a pillow corner or near a reading chair, toys with pieces (and building blocks) in plastic bins under the bed or on a toy shelf.
#3. Label it or keep it visible. Kids are easily distracted and need visual reminders of what-where-how. Clear bins and containers are ideal.
#4. Rotate & re-position. Scale back the number of toys. This is also an effective strategy for teaching better clean-up practices. Help your child to manage a a smaller number of toys at a time and rotate toys in and out of "use" weekly or monthly.
#3 Donate or Swap. This is a great activity to involve older children in. Teach giving by allowing your child to pick toys they are no longer interested in or are too old for to donate to a child that doesn't have any toys. Our MOPS group as a swap where our children (us too) can pick things we don't need to take and swap with our friends for something "new"! Loads of fun!
#5. The toy hospital. Toys get broken; they lose a few pieces and need a time-out until the other pieces are found. Designate a space for broken, tired and outgrown toys. Cut out a cardboard box as a toy hospital, paint it and decorate with "first-aid" stickers or art.